Safeguarding Your Child: A Guide to Dealing with Cyberbullying

The increasing exposure of children to the online world in the age of digital connectivity makes them susceptible to cyberbullying. As a parent, discovering that your child is a victim of cyberbullying can be distressing, but it's crucial to respond promptly and effectively. Here's a comprehensive guide on what to do if your child is being cyberbullied before it’s too late.

Maintain Calm Communication:

• Approach the situation with a calm demeanor. Initiate an open and non-judgmental conversation with your child, Making sure they feel safe sharing this information. Establishing trust and not making them feel guilty is paramount in understanding the full extent of cyberbullying.

Document the Evidence:

• Gather evidence such as screenshots, messages, or posts. This documentation will be valuable proof when reporting the incident to authorities or platform administrators.

Block and Report:

• Instruct your child to block the bully on all relevant platforms and report the incident using available reporting mechanisms and meet with school administrators. Most online platforms take cyberbullying seriously and have policies in place to address such issues.  Schools have very specific guidelines regarding this problem, although occasionally I do hear complaints that not enough is done.  

Involve School Authorities:

• If the cyberbullying involves classmates, inform your school authorities. Many educational institutions have established protocols for handling cyberbullying incidents that occur outside the school and can take appropriate measures to ensure your child's safety in school.

Seek Professional Help:

•  Your child is probably experiencing emotional distress, so please consider involving mental health professionals. Counseling can provide support and guidance for both you and your child to cope with the emotional impact of cyberbullying.  Cyberbullying can be deadly.

Educate and Empower:

• Empower your child with knowledge about online safety and responsible digital behavior. Digital predators are real and can be students or adults. Teach your child to recognize and appropriately respond to cyberbullying situations independently while sharing this information with you. Reinforce the importance of reporting any suspicious or harmful online behavior. If you see an article or tv show that covers this a small reference to it will keep this on their radar.

Monitor and Restrict Online Activity:

• Implement monitoring tools or parental controls to keep track of your child's online activities. If necessary, restrict access to certain websites or platforms to create a safer online environment for your child. Unfortunately, many savvy kids can get around these safeguards.
• Remember, combating cyberbullying requires a collaborative effort between parents, schools, and online platforms. Stay vigilant, communicate openly with your child, and take the necessary actions promptly to protect them from the harmful effects of cyberbullying. By addressing the issue, you can contribute to creating a safer online space for your child and others.

Part 2

As a follow-up to my last article, my recommendation is no electronics in the bedroom at night.  

Having devices in the bedroom at bedtime will contribute to an increased risk of cyberbullying for several reasons. Here's why this practice may be a recipe for cyberbullying:

Lack of Parental Supervision:

• When children have electronic devices, such as smartphones or computers, in their bedrooms at night, it becomes challenging for parents to monitor their online activities closely. The absence of direct supervision will create an environment where cyberbullying can occur without immediate detection.

Increased Unsolicited Online Interactions:

• With devices readily available, children are more likely to engage in unsupervised online interactions, such as social media conversations or messaging apps. This lack of supervision exposes them to potential cyberbullying from peers or strangers 24/7.

Anonymity and Impersonal Communication:

• The digital realm provides anonymity that emboldens kids to engage in cyberbullying. When children are using electronic devices in the privacy of their bedrooms, they may encounter harmful messages or harassment without the immediate support of parents.  It happens and it can be lethal.  Be aware this danger can occur for hours nightly, and may go on for weeks and months without your knowledge. Teen suicide from cyberbullying happens more than you think. Students are almost twice as likely to attempt suicide if they get cyberbullied.  13.6 percent of adolescents have made a serious suicide attempt after being cyberbullied.

24/7 Connectivity:

• Keeping electronic devices in the bedroom at night means constant connectivity, allowing potential cyberbullying incidents to extend beyond school hours. This continuous access to the online world can contribute to prolonged exposure to harmful content or interactions.

Social Comparison and Pressure:

• Social media platforms often foster an environment where individuals, especially females, compare themselves to their peers. This constant comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy or pressure to conform, potentially resulting in anxiety and depression.

Impact on Sleep and Mental Health:

• Electronic devices in the bedroom can impact sleep quality and overall mental health. Sleep deprivation and increased stress levels may make children more vulnerable to the emotional toll of cyberbullying.

Delayed Reporting and Intervention:

• If a child experiences cyberbullying in the privacy of their bedroom, they may be hesitant to report it immediately. Delayed reporting will hinder timely intervention by parents, educators, or authorities, allowing the cyberbullying to persist or escalate and bring potentially devastating harm.

To mitigate the risk of cyberbullying, it is advisable for parents to establish clear rules regarding device usage, especially during nighttime hours. Encouraging open communication, teaching online safety, and monitoring online activities can help create a safer digital environment for children, reducing the likelihood of encountering cyberbullying situations.

Mike Bogdanski 

America’s ANTI Bully

Empowering Strategies for Kids Bullied on the Bus

 

Empowering Strategies for Kids Bullied on the Bus

A five-year-old we know often complains of being bullied and harassed on the bus along with other children. The bullies on a school bus have a captive audience, including a driver who is focused on the road. I have a few tips for dealing with bullying on the school bus. Now that your child is in a contained environment with a ride that can last up to 30 minutes and longer, with very little supervision, you can see why buses are one of the top places where bullying takes place. Being bullied on the school bus is a scary experience for children, impacting their emotional well-being and overall school experience. To help empower kids facing this challenge, here are four effective strategies they can employ:

Confidence Building:

1. One of the most powerful weapons against bullying is self-confidence. Encourage your child when entering the bus to stand tall, make eye contact, and project confidence. Bullies often target those they perceive as vulnerable, and a confident demeanor can deter potential aggressors.  Over sixty percent of communication is nonverbal and, practicing assertive body language, and having a warrior face (if needed) can help your child feel more in control and less susceptible to intimidation.  Like any other skill, this needs rehearsal as a tool against bullies who are looking to make intimidation their game.  Even small people can have a “you can’t defeat me” attitude.  

Establish Support Networks:

2. Creating a support network can significantly help a child facing bullying. Encourage your child to identify friends or peers on the bus who may be experiencing similar challenges. Strength lies in numbers, and having allies can provide emotional support and deter bullies. Many years ago we had a similar situation with a kindergarten karate student.  We had a black-belt eighth grader on the same bus who addressed the bullies—no more problems.  When a bystander sticks up for a child being bullied, the bullying stops in thirty seconds or less, over 80 percent of the time. 

Communication with school staff and teachers ensures that adults know the situation and must intervene appropriately.  Telling the bus driver is not being a tattle-tale, it is reporting a breach of school policy.  Establishing a sense of teamwork with friends both on the bus and within the school environment reinforces the idea that no one should endure bullying alone and yes sometimes we may need a bodyguard. 

Utilize Technological Tools:

3. Technology can be a powerful ally in combating bullying in the digital age. Encourage older children to use their smartphones (if they are old enough) to discreetly document instances of bullying through photos, videos, or voice recordings. This evidence can be crucial when reporting incidents to school authorities, providing concrete proof of the behavior. Additionally, there are various safety apps available that allow children to send distress signals or share their location with trusted contacts in real-time. These tools can empower kids to take control of their safety and find help when needed.

Develop Conflict Resolution Skills:

4. Teaching children effective conflict resolution skills equips them to handle bullying situations with poise and intelligence. Encourage your child to practice assertive communication, express their feelings, and set boundaries calmly. Role-playing scenarios and teaching a child to remain calm with long slow breaths are helpful.  Saying “back away” with a strong voice and good eye contact is the million-dollar defense. Rehearsing this with your children will make them feel more prepared and confident in addressing bullying situations. Also, teaching empathy to your child, allows them to be an upstander instead of a bystander fosters a “no bullying”  community, and promotes a positive and inclusive environment on the bus.

Encourage your child to practice positive self-talk. Make sure they know they have your support and that you are always available to listen. Finally, remind them that they are strong and can stand up for themselves if needed.

By implementing these strategies, children can develop the resilience and skills needed to navigate the challenges of being bullied or watching bullying on the bus. Empowering them to build confidence, establish support networks, leverage technology responsibly, and develop conflict resolution skills will contribute to a safer and more positive school bus experience.  There is no easy solution to this problem.

Mike Bogdanski 

America’s Anti-bully