Thursday, December 11, 2008
Friday, October 31, 2008
Bullying Online Is Common-

Nearly three in four teenagers say they were bullied online at least once during a recent 12-month period.
Only one in 10 reported cyber-bullying to parents or other adults,
(according to a new study by UCLA psychologists).
Of those bullied online, 85% have been bullied at school.
If you get bullied at school you get bullied on the pc too.
"Bullying affects millions of students and is not limited to school grounds.
"Bullying on the Internet looks similar to what kids do face-to-face in school. Among heavy users of the Internet, cyber-bullying is a common experience, and the forms of online and in-school bullying are more alike than different.
Why do so few teenagers tell their parents about being bullied online? The most common reason for not telling an adult, cited by half the bullied participants, was that teens believe they "need to learn to deal with it."
-31% of kids reported that they do not tell because they are concerned their parents might restrict their Internet access.
-46 percent of girls feared restrictions, compared with 27 percent of boys in the same age group.
Many parents have little understanding of their children's Internet use or how vital the Internet is to their social lives. Parents can take action with good intentions and try to protect their children by not letting them use the Internet at all. This is not likely to help parent-teen relationships or the social lives of their children. Most children are using the Internet mainly to connect with friends, not to meet new people, previous research has shown. Kids are mainly using the Internet to maintain relationships like we used to in the old days when we chatted for hours on the phone or hung out at someone's house.
An interesting statistic- 73% of the participants who reported being cyber-bullied said they knew, or were pretty sure they knew, who was doing the bullying. (This is counter to the myth that cyber-bullying is anonymous. Research does not support the assumption that the Internet is changing the nature of bullying.
The most prevalent forms of bullying online and in school involved name-calling or insults. Password theft was the next most common cyber-bullying tactic. Bullying also includes threats, sending embarrassing pictures, sharing private information without permission and spreading nasty rumors.
Cell phones and computers are not the cause of problems among teenagers but are tools that can be used to interact with peers in both antisocial and healthy ways. Parents might overestimate the risk of bullying online and downplay the risk of bullying in school.
Schools are getting better at taking action to reduce bullying — including teaching students strategies for coping with and responding to bullying — and some of them address cyber-bullying as well. There is no reason why cyber-bullying should be 'beyond' the school's responsibility to address. Schools need to enforce intolerance of any type of intimidation among students, regardless of whether it takes place on or outside school grounds.
Bullying is a problem that large numbers of kids confront on a daily basis at school. It's not just an issue for the few unfortunate ones on the internet. Students report feeling humiliated, anxious or disliking school on days when they reported incidents, which shows there is no such thing as 'harmless' name-calling or an 'innocent' punch. Bullying occurs across ethnic groups and income brackets. There is no single user profile or type of target.
Middle school students who are bullied in school are likely to feel depressed, lonely and miserable, which in turn makes them more vulnerable to further bullying incidents. Harassment at school interferes with the ability to learn and makes many students want to withdraw. Children who are embarrassed or humiliated about being bullied in school are unlikely to discuss it with their parents or teacher. They are more likely to suffer in silence and dislike or will be afraid of attending school. I would love parents to talk with their children about bullying before it ever happens, pay attention to changes in your children's behavior and take their concerns seriously.
Kids really do want help.
Mike
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Hi Tech Back To School Tips
Whether your child is entering kindergarten this fall or nearing graduation, here's a rundown of tips and Web sites to help you get the school year off to a good start.
Technology
· Create a family code of conduct for home computer use. Include important safety tips. Microsoft has a template at www.microsoft.com/protect/family/guidelines/contract.mspx.
· Watch out for cyberbullies -- kids using text messages, e-mails or Web sites such as MySpace.com or Facebook.com to harass other students (and sometimes teachers). If your child is harassed online, save all communications and report the problem to local police, your Internet service provider or the Web site moderator (look for an e-mail address at the bottom of the Web page).
· Also, is your child a cyberbully? Have him take the quiz at www.stopcyberbullying.org/teens/are_you_a_cyberbully.html
SOURCE: National Crime Prevention Council; Microsoft.com.
Homework/studying
· Expect about 10 minutes of homework per grade -- about half an hour for a third grader, for example.
· It's fine to look over your children's homework to answer questions. But don't correct their work or do work for them. Whatever the child's age, if he or she isn't getting assignments done satisfactorily, he or she needs more supervision. More tips on this: http://www.ed.gov/parents/academic/help/homework/index.html.
· Most area libraries offer free homework help and tutoring to students with a library card. Visit Seattle Public Library's page at www.spl.org/default.asp?pageID=audience_teens_homeworkcal and King County Library System's page at www.kcls.org/research/index.cfm.
· Apprehensive about the high school WASL? Find practice tests and a scoring guide at www.k12.wa.us/assessment/WASL/WASLPractice-ParentStudent.aspx.
SOURCE: National Education Association, U.S. Department of Education, Seattle Public Library, King County Library System, OSPI
Safety
· It's best to leave the iPods, cell phones and other electronic toys at home. Most schools ban them during school hours anyway -- and students have been robbed of their electronic items going to or from school.
· Other items to leave at home: over-the-counter medicines; toy weapons or small Swiss Army knives; lighters, matches or firecrackers; Heelys (skate shoes); dice and cards.
· A reminder (especially for teen drivers): In Seattle, a speed van will monitor drivers at some schools. Drivers failing to obey the speed limit, usually 20 mph, can get a $189 ticket.
· If the school bus doesn't arrive within 20 minutes of the scheduled time, call your district's main office or its transportation department. For Seattle Public Schools, call the transportation department at 206-252-0900.
SOURCE: Seattle Public Schools, Seattle Police Department
Stay connected
· Seattle Public Schools parents can sign up for The Source www.seattleschools.org/area/source/index.dxml, an online portal where they can view their child's schedule, attendance, test scores and grades.
· Sign up for your school's or PTA's e-mail newsletter. Find links to regional school districts' Web sites at our School Zone blog, http://blog.seattlepi.com/schoolzone. The district Web site usually includes links to its schools' Web pages.
· Establish a relationship with your child's teacher(s) early in the year, and check in regularly. Ask if they prefer phone calls or e-mails.
· Check out your school's report card at http://reportcard.ospi.k12.wa.us/summary.aspx?year=2007-08. Here you can find and compare information on Washington public schools' WASL scores, enrollment, finances and teacher qualifications.
· School delays or closures are posted at www.schoolreport.org; parents can sign up for e-mail alerts for a particular school.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
A New Commandment!
There should be a new commandment. “Thou shall not ignore bullying”
Students make lots of excuses for not sticking up for
kids being targets of bullying.
“It’s not my problem.”
“They deserve it.”
“I am not a tattletale.”
“They are not my friend/group.”
When they don’t stick up for a person that is being bullied it not only hurts victim but it hurts the bystander too.
But kids don’t interrupt bullying because;
They are afraid of becoming the target.
Don’t think it’s a big deal
Don’t know what to do.
It’s like a chemical shift in the bystander, just like any high stress situation the feeling of fight or flight enters their world. We need to train kids that the greatest leaders of the world have a moral code of responsibility to do what is right.
Bushido- the ethical code of the samurai is characterized by several key points.
Benevolence- characterizes the true goodness of the mind and spirit is the unbiased kindness to do good. It is the expression of agape love (Greek word for unconditional love).
Rectitude- rightness of principal, justice.
James Williams' article "Virtue of the sword", describes a fairly simple explanation of bushido:
“The warrior protects and defends because he realizes the value of others. He knows that they are essential to society and, in his gift of service, recognizes and values theirs... take the extra moment in dark parking lots at night to make sure that a woman gets into her car safely before leaving yourself. Daily involvement in acts such as these are as much a part of training as time spent in the dojo, and indeed should be the reason for that time spent training... When faced with a woman or child in a situation in which they are vulnerable, there are two types of men: those who would offer succor and aid, and those who would prey upon them. And in modern society, there is another loathsome breed who would totally ignore their plight!”
Lets each kids it's their duty to stick up for someone being bullied
Mike Bogdanski
www.mikebogdanski.com
Friday, March 14, 2008
The "Happy Slap"

What once was just a mild physical threat meant to intimidate and embarass someone has taken on serious meanings. Born out of South London as "Slap TV" was originally bullies fighting by phone and soon became a huge deviant craze. France has now criminalized "happy slapping" and the video assistant is also complicit as an accessory in the crime.
Humiliation is no longer just a schoolyard event but a global one.
www.mikebogdanski.com
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
"The Truth About Cyber Bullying"
Cell phones and computers are the greatest inventions of this century and one of the greatest bully tools. Anna, a 14-year-old high school student from
Cyberbullying is a serious threat to teens. Stories like Anna’s occur daily in every state and town. The National Crime Prevention Council defines cyberbullying as “teens using the Internet, cell phones, or other devices to send or post text or images intended to hurt or embarrass another person.”
In Anna's case, the bullies were classmates that she had known for a long time. She was considered an “easy girl” at the school because someone said he had caught her making out with an older student. This gossip turned out to be untrue, but too late. The bullies posted the video on the Internet - because “everybody does it.” The bullies took inspiration from bouncers of a local club who filmed two teenagers having sex in a bathroom. Soon after the video was published on the Web, the couple had to change their school and even dyed their hair so people wouldn't recognize them.
Cyberbullying now affects over thirty percent of American teens. Twenty percent have been threatened online more than once. Almost 60 percent have not told their parents about their problems. The worst is in
At first, the authorities from Anna's school wanted to brush this tragedy under the carpet. The molestation occurred when no teacher was in the classroom because she had been called out by the principal. Leaving 20 students unsupervised was a breach of school policy. When the teacher returned Anna was brought to the nurse and sent home. The four bullies resumed their day as if nothing happened. Anna's parents were not home at that time so she was left with her brother. No school authorities called Anna later to ask how she was doing.
Cyberbullying has its roots in school violence. A study published in the Journal of School Violence found that “bullies [are] among the most popular students in the school, receiving more peer nominations on average than students uninvolved in bullying.”.
Polish television reported on high school students who verbally abused their teacher and then put a trashcan on his head. The incident was recorded and posted on video websites. The teacher later retired and the bullies went unpunished
Cyberbullying is anonymous and cowardly. You don’t have to be big and strong to hide behind your cell phone or laptop. Socialization now happens by instant message, facebook, myspace and chat rooms.
There is no perfect way to protect your child from cyberbullying. “Parents also need to understand that a child is just as likely to be a cyberbully as a target of cyberbullying and often go back and forth between the two roles. Children have killed committed suicide after having been involved in cyberbullying incidents.
The day when Anna's was stripped and humiliated in public was her last visit to school. “Everyone was laughing; it all was great fun,” remembered a boy who witnessed the entire episode. He looked uncomfortable in the suit that his parents told him to wear to Anna's funeral.
She hung herself in her room when the shameful video had been published on the web.
Is bullying a problem?
Mike Bogdanski
www.mikebogdanski.com
Friday, November 23, 2007
Cyber Bullying

Traditionally, bullying has involved physical bullying, verbal bullying, or social bullying. Today technology has given everyone a new means of bullying each other.
Cyber bullying, which is sometimes referred to as online social cruelty or electronic bullying, can involve:
- Mean, vulgar, or threatening messages or images
- Posting sensitive, private information
- Pretending to be someone else in order to make that person look bad
Kids can cyberbully each other through:
- Instant messaging
- Text message
- Web sites
- Blogs
- Chat rooms
- 18% of students in grades 6-8 said they had been cyberbullied at least once in the last couple of months; and 6% said it had happened to them 2 or more times (Kowalski et al., 2005).
- 11% of students in grades 6-8 said they had cyberbullied another person at least once in the last couple of months, and 2% said they had done it two or more times (Kowalski et al., 2005).
- 19% of regular Internet users between the ages of 10 and 17 reported being involved in online aggression; 15% had been aggressors, and 7% had been targets (3% were both aggressors and targets) (Ybarra & Mitchell, 2004).
- 17% of 6-11 year-olds and 36% of 12-17-year-olds reported that someone said threatening or embarrassing things about them through e-mail, instant messages, web sites, chat rooms, or text messages (Fight Crime: Invest in Kids, 2006).
- Cyber bullying has increased in recent years. In nationally representative surveys of 10-17 year-olds, twice as many children and youth indicated that they had been victims and perpetrators of online harassment in 2005 compared with 1999/2000 (Wolak, Mitchell, & Finkelhor, 2006).
Who are the victims and perpetrators of cyber bullying?
In a recent study of students in grades 6-8 (Kowalski et al., 2005):
- Girls were about twice as likely as boys to be victims and perpetrators of cyber bullying.
- Of those students who had been cyberbullied relatively frequently (at least twice in the last couple of months):
- 62% said that they had been cyberbullied by another student at school, and 46% had been cyberbullied by a friend.
- 55% didn't know who had cyberbullied them.
- Of those students who admitted cyber bullying others relatively frequently:
- 60% had cyberbullied another student at school, and 56% had cyberbullied a friend.
What are the methods of cyber bullying?
In recent studies of middle and high school students, (Fight Crime: Invest in Kids, 2006; Kowalski et al., 2005; Wolak, Mitchell, & Finkelhor, 2006) the most common way that children and youth reported being cyberbullied was through instant messaging. Somewhat less common ways involved the use of chat rooms, e-mails, and messages posted on web sites. A study of younger children (Fight Crime: Invest in Kids, 2006) showed that they were most often bullied through e-mail, comments on a web site, or in a chat room.
Do children tell they are being cyber bullied?
According to one telephone survey of preteens and teens (Fight Crime: Invest in Kids, 2006):
- 51% of preteens but only 35% of teens who had been cyber bullied had told their parents about their experience;
- 27% of preteens and only 9% of teens who had been cyber bullied had told a teacher;
- 44% of preteens and 72% of teens who had been cyber bullied had told a friend;
- 31% of preteens and 35% of teens who had been cyber bullied had told a brother or sister; and
- 16% of preteens and teens who had been cyber bullied had told no one.
How does cyber bullying differ from other traditional forms of bullying?
Although there is little research yet on cyber bullying among children and youth, available research and experience suggest that cyber bullying may differ from more “traditional” forms of bullying in a number of ways (Willard, 2005), including:
- Cyber bullying can occur any time of the day or night;
- Cyber bullying messages and images can be distributed quickly to a very wide audience;
- Children and youth can be anonymous when cyber bullying, which makes it difficult (and sometimes impossible) to trace them.
What can adults do to prevent cyber bullying?
Adults seldom are present in the online environments frequented by children and youth. Therefore, it is extremely important that adults pay close attention to the cyber bullying and the activities of children and youth when using these new technologies.
Suggestions for parents*
Tips to help prevent cyber bullying:
- Keep your home computer(s) in easily viewable places , such as a family room or kitchen.
- Talk regularly with your child about on-line activities he or she is involved in.
- Talk specifically about cyber bullying and encourage your child to tell you immediately if he or she is the victim of cyber bullying, cyberstalking, or other illegal or troublesome on-line behavior.
- Encourage your child to tell you if he or she is aware of others who may be the victims of such behavior.
- Explain that cyber bullying is harmful and unacceptable behavior. Outline your expectations for responsible online behavior and make it clear that there will be consequences for inappropriate behavior.
- Although adults must respect the privacy of children and youth, concerns for your child’s safety may sometimes override these privacy concerns. Tell your child that you may review his or her on-line communications if you think there is reason for concern.
- Consider installing parental control filtering software and/or tracking programs, but don’t rely solely on these tools.
Tips for dealing with cyber bullying that your child has experienced:
Because cyber bullying can range from rude comments to lies, impersonations, and threats, your responses may depend on the nature and severity of the cyber bullying. Here are some actions that you may want to take after-the-fact.
- Strongly encourage your child not to respond to the cyber bullying.
- Do not erase the messages or pictures. Save these as evidence.
- Try to identify the individual doing the cyber bullying. Even if the cyberbully is anonymous (e.g., is using a fake name or someone else’s identity) there may be a way to track them through your Internet Service Provider. If the cyber bullying is criminal (or if you suspect that it may be), contact the police and ask them to do the tracking.
- Sending inappropriate language may violate the “Terms and Conditions” of e-mail services, Internet Service Providers, web sites, and cell phone companies. Consider contacting these providers and filing a complaint.
- If the cyber bullying is coming through e-mail or a cell phone, it may be possible to block future contact from the cyberbully. Of course, the cyberbully may assume a different identity and continue the bullying.
- Contact your school. If the cyber bullying is occurring through your school district’s Internet system, school administrators have an obligation to intervene. Even if the cyber bullying is occurring off campus, make your school administrators aware of the problem. They may be able to help you resolve the cyber bullying or be watchful for face-to-face bullying.
- Consider contacting the cyberbully’s parents. These parents may be very concerned to learn that their child has been cyber bullying others, and they may effectively put a stop to the bullying. On the other hand, these parents may react very badly to your contacting them. So, proceed cautiously. If you decide to contact a cyberbully’s parents, communicate with them in writing — not face-to-face. Present proof of the cyber bullying (e.g., copies of an e-mail message) and ask them to make sure the cyber bullying stops.
- Consider contacting an attorney in cases of serious cyber bullying. In some circumstances, civil law permits victims to sue a bully or his or her parents in order to recover damages.
- Contact the police if cyber bullying involves acts such as:
- Threats of violence
- Extortion
- Obscene or harassing phone calls or text messages
- Harassment, stalking, or hate crimes
- Child pornography
Suggestions for educators
- Educate your students, teachers, and other staff members about cyber bullying, its dangers, and what to do if someone is cyberbullied.
- Be sure that your school’s anti-bullying rules and policies address cyber bullying.
- Closely monitor students’ use of computers at school.
- Use filtering and tracking software on all computers, but don’t rely solely on this software to screen out cyber bullying and other problematic on-line behavior.
- Investigate reports of cyber bullying immediately. If cyber bullying occurs through the school district’s Internet system, you are obligated to take action. If the cyber bullying occurs off-campus, consider what actions you might take to help address the bullying:
- Notify parents of victims and parents of cyberbullies of known or suspected cyber bullying.
- Notify the police if the known or suspected cyber bullying involves a threat.
- Closely monitor the behavior of the affected students at school for possible bullying.
- Talk with all students about the harms caused by cyber bullying. Remember — cyber bullying that occurs off-campus can travel like wildfire among your students and can affect how they behave and relate to each other at school.
- Investigate to see if the victim(s) of cyber bullying could use some support from a school counselor or school-based mental health professional.
- Contact the police immediately if known or suspected cyber bullying involves acts such as:
- Threats of violence
- Extortion
- Obscene or harassing phone calls or text messages
- Harassment, stalking, or hate crimes
- Child pornography
Information from health resources and service admin